For the very first time, i really wish I have known how to scold all the foul words used to people that I have to work with right now.
Sudahlah my project was changed totally from A to Z, Ive to work with 2 biatches and I DO NOT LIKE TO BE COMMAND! Im not your slave. I have my own way to do my things. You can not agree with my way, so am I!
I really regreted I dint force my lecturer to give them a hard time, for simply simply change my project without giving me time to think about it. I really regreted the fast decision I made, which is not to give a bad impression to the ex-supervisor.
For you guys that do not know what Im upto now, is my research sem now. Other frens are having their nice time and fun in the labs as well as hospitals to finish their research and come out with that stupidly-comb binded-thick-blue book. This is the time where you can crap but you cant crap..Crap to make it long winded, cant crap because u need literatures to support it.
I was trying so hard to please the biatches, but I just think at times, they really had gone too far. I was holding it very long, making my gastric come again, and Im dreading with this research, although everyday, im trying to tell myself, today it will change.
They NEVER call the supervisor themselves. "Since supervisor talk to you more during the 1st visit, u call her la". "Since u have call her the 1st time, then, now it should be you to call her everytime". "You ask her la the number of the doctor, and then we call the doctor la". "Since u ask more, then u present to the doctors and nurses tomorrow then". "You ask the hubby of the lady, and see if his wife is going for ceasarrean or natural birth la because u are just sitting beside him".
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This research is to see which type of analgesic works best in managing post ceasarrean pain. the main limitation of this study is that Drug X, which is one of the 3 medication used is not commonly given to these patients because it is very expensive and it's analgesic effects are as good as others. Why need this medication? But since we wanna compare within the type of the class of a medication, we have to include drug X. Somehow, drug X will precipitate in a very insignificant amount to the breast milk and we were asked what will happen to the baby if the baby gets the medication from the breastfeeding mothers? Because there is still POTENTIAL that it will be tranfered to the baby.
Today is even worst. They wanted me to call the doctor that we have to ammend the way we research after a whole week of research started. The reason we have to ammend is because from the very start, we are violating the law. However then, we are not aware we are wrong because supervisor said ok, and we just carry on, because she knew more ma... Then, after a whole week, she realised shouldnt be doing that way and we have to contact all the DOCTORS in the gynae ward to notify them about the changes. I tell you, DOCTORS are the WORST people on earth. MOST of them [so far I only met 3 which respect you as human] are simply animal heart and mind with a human figure. They never treat u like a human. They say nasty words to you although we ask if its ok we can talk to them.
FINE. what can we do? What is not correct, have to be corrected. I do as what they say and contacted another doctor which is much associate with this study. This doctor is a nice doctor, but she wasnt in the hospital. I told her everythg about why we need to change the method because she ask me why a sudden? Is already a week, all the doctors are working for us like we planned, and now change. Why? and guess what? MY LOVELY BIATCHES teammates, right after the call, was condemning me [though biatch 1 was commenting on how should i say to the dr on the phone]:
Biatch 1: Why did you tell her that it have to be ammend because it was not quite correct the way we do it at the first place?
Biatch 2: Ya lor... if you tell her this, she will think we are wrong. She wont believe us again? Cant u just tell her that it was just not in our methodology to tag the days for which medication to be given on each everyday?
Pinky: I told her. She ask me why? Why a sudden change. There should be a reason why right?
Biatch 2: But you dont have to let her know ma. Just say our supervisor said it.
Pinky: Is there a difference if i tell her now, before she need to hear from our supervisor? She will still know the reason why eventually.
Biatch 1: Just say la that we have to change it, and say nothing at all. If she wanna talk to supervisor, then, only then, let our supervisor to deal with the problem or questions she ask la.
Pinky: She is in our research ma. Takkan Ive to hide something from her?
Biatch 1: But if she wanna know, she will talk to the supervisor herself ma. She is just another doctor in the hospital, she just find it fun and she wanna join the study and you told her all these!
[Eh commonla... Doctor is asking me on the phone, if I sound fishy, would she just ignore? what will she think a person I am? Someone that keeps secret or do not tell it all on something important?]Biatch 1: I hear you say this what doctors cannot give, and you say yes, doctors cannot give
Pinky: yes, I say the truth. Because dr's concern is also our concern, on whether we get enough sample by the month of research ends. so, i told her our supervisor also working out to contact other hospitals that prescribe drug X to approve us to recruit their patients.
Biatch 1: Then.. You shouldnt say that doctors cannot give.
Pinky: I dint! I was just saying yes, we also aware that the doctors do not give drug X commonly in treating post ceasarrean pain.
Biatch 1: oh ohkay... Just that when other ppl ask again, or when u tok again, u just dont mention we did something wrong. u must say like...blah blah blah...
SHIT MAN! REALLY SHIT! IM REALLY PISSED!
You want me to do what you want. When i tell you what the supervisor say, you blame it on me, on dunno how to discuss with supervisor. When i tell you what the supervisor want us to do, you refuse and Ive to call the supervisor in front of you to let u hear what I talk to her and in return, I was question by supervisor on whether I listened to her orders previously. In the end, you still have to do what I say although u are reluctant. The difference is just that the supervisor have bad impression on me!
Oh GREAT! I was condemn by one part and another part, i was question on my ability to understand what i was told we need to do. Eh... my thesis have to be marked by my supervisor eh. U guys want to flunk me isit? Since I am wrong and dont have a brain, fine, you please use your own phone credit to call the supervisor. You so clever, you talk la.
You can choose when and who you want to get to sign your consent form of the patient, but I cant. Ive to not decide when is the right time to collect the data, and when is the time I think is best getting it. You only have the mouth to ask me to work, but what about u?
After i show her im not happy and i seemed to let them know im not gonna talk since what i talk also not correct, then, nevermind. I shut up! then, you come like a puppy to me. Trying to praise me after I do my part informing the doctors. Dont think you are too important. You praises are just a piece of shit thrown to me. Keep it to yourself. You guys are just simply hypocrites, trying to show that you are good girls, good looking ones and have the urge and initiative to work.
I really hate this. I should be doing something that I want this sem, but it turn out to be I have to listen to these ppl whom they think they have better mouth and better brain! Now... Do I have a brain or just simply im petty?
