Shit me..

I have been trying very hard to forget. I really had. But why, is my heart still feels for him? Because I havent get a definite answer from his mouth? Or because the problem was me, not moving on?

Ive tried hard to forget and forgive. But whenever, I heard he has been contacting some other friends, it hurts me. Yes, i know currently he is overseas doing the nation proud, but it is really devastating, time without his news at all.

I do hope that he will directly tell to my face what he wants. I do and Im ready for all consequences. Should I be honest to him this time again or should I wait till he's the one finding for me and asking me why arent I responding?

ARGHHHHHHH... What should i do? Sun Kei Ji Yin? Sometimes, I do hope the situation can make me do so. I wish my brain could delete the unwanted part.. I need a crash to get my brain damage.. But surely I know, I couldnt give up my life because there are still people who really wanted me to leave. How i really wish I can forget him only if he wasnt meant for me.. Please God. Show me Your way..